The holiday's are always a sad time for me. Thanksgiving is when I miss my Mom the most. This year was a little more sadder for me. I am mad at her for not being here for me during this time. I know that if she could she would have. I have gone through all major adult stuff without her getting married, having Tyler, going through infertility, moving, having a miscarriage and now breast cancer. Can't I get a break? Um no so for Thanksgiving I got mouth sores, thrush and a cold. Yeah in one week. Go me! So Thanksgiving this year instead of spending it with family and friends I spent it home alone napping and trying to get rid of this cold. Today it is almost gone and the thrush is gone. Mouth sores are still here but I have a feeling they are here to stay.
Today I started to go through a box of pictures and kept the ones I want to scan and keep. It made me smile to see pictures of me with my parents and as I was growing up.
I am very thankful for my husband and son. They are my rocks but I am also very thankful for what my mother had taught me wit her battle with cancer to say FU I will beat you and I will be around for my children. Now I have another FU I will not let you come back and take me from my son. I want to see him fall in love and get married and meet my grandchildren. That is my goal and I will get to it one step at a time.
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